From here to eternity, pt. I

For better or worse, this is my life, and a bad life it is not. I'm just not enjoying it very much.

In 2005, I began working for an ecommerce company that shall remain nameless and was already circling the drain. I was happy to have a job and perplexed by the long faces and unhelpful postures of my coworkers. A year and a couple rounds of layoffs later, I got caught in the vortex of corporate ennui that threatened to swallow the entire company. It wasn't quite Office Space, but it wasn't far off; social gatherings around the coffee maker, birthday "celebrations," hopelessly transparent pep talks that couldn't paper over the rumors of impending financial insolvency. It was more about the evil of banality than vice versa. Ever day was the same, every office is the same and they all have the same rituals.

I distinctly remember riding my bike to work and thinking, this cannot be how the rest of my life is going to be, hopping from one cube farm to the next with ever-diminishing returns. So, this blog was launched in the beginning of 2007 after a lightening bolt hit me, telling me that I needed to enlist in the Green army. That jolt lasted the better part of eight months and fizzled, which is not to say that environmental and conservation no longer interested me. At the time, I toyed with the idea of starting a green business and, true to my risk-averse ways, basically wilted after getting lukewarm feedback from a variety of friends and family. See, I don't have a lot of faith, so the green idea petered out.

The company was ultimately purchased by private investors whose energy reinvigorated my commitment for awhile. That turned out to be a blip on an otherwise unrelenting downward trajectory of dissatisfaction with the corporate work environment. While I singlehandedly reshaped the image and corporate identity of the company through my design work, I received virtually no acknowledgment for a job well done. At the first conference of the "new" company, I was largely responsible for the theme and look of what was ultimately a very successful relaunch of the brand. The totality of the feedback I received for that success was persistent stink-eye over a minor typo in the marketing materials that was ultimately caught by no one.

And so it went for the next several months after the conference, as I reluctantly stepped back from the ledge of resignation. With the economy going in the shitter, I was forced to be practical and followed the same advice from my brother whenever push came to shove: "Sleep on it."

Come June of that year, I also stumbled on an old crush through Facebook, Becca, a happenstance that would change the complexion and course of my thoughts and feelings. Old flames reconnecting through the internet, and Facebook in particular, seems to have reach epidemic proportions and the cliche runs strongly through me. Becca and I went to high school together and I never recovered from the disappointment of never having the chance to date her.

At the time, I was involved in a very ambiguous relationship with Camile, a wonderful woman I had dated formally for seven months and subsequently stayed intimate with for over two years. As I considered possibilities with Becca, things went from grey to black and white with Camile when she got tired of waiting for me to re-commit and found someone new.

Someday, I may learn how to be satisfied as a single guy, but that day hasn't come yet. Losing Camile was a moment that reminds me a lot of (unintentionally) eating a habañero chile; it doesn't quite hurt immediately, but the sense of great pain on the immediate horizon is unmistakable. And the pain sure came.

The big dogs step in

It was only a matter of time before Daddy Warbucks threw his hat in the ring and why not, I suppose. Yahoo recently launched Yahoo Green and is now sponsoring a contest for designers to create an icon that will be used to represent green products throughout its family of sites and networks. How Yahoo presumes to deem something officially "green" is unknown. This, combined with the acquisitions of Zaadz.com by Gaiam and Treehugger.com by Discovery Communications, reeks of sellout.

While these moves undoubtedly take the green movement closer to the mainstream, one has to wonder if the opportunities that vested interests see in the market serve to strengthen it or undermine it. There is a strain of thought that believes true "green" and true environmentalism cannot coexist peacefully within capitalism, since conspicuous consumption and other monetary pressures that go along with it compromise green principles at every step of the way. In essence, it's difficult - well-nigh impossible - to place a monetary value on the things that bring true value to our lives...clean air, clean water, the colors, smells and sounds of nature, food created healthfully. So how do we expect these things to survive and, ideally flourish, if we no longer even understand their value in our lives and the only value that exists is money?

From what I can see, Yahoo Greenz appears to bring a lot of disparate information together pretty effectively, which is a tremendous resource for those seeking green information and alternatives. Nevertheless, the burden is on us, the informed citizen, to remain vigilant and protect green principles from agents too easily tempted by profit and dollars.

A misanthrope speaks

Here's an old clip of George Carlin doing what he does best - rant. This is from back in 1992, during the last big wave of eco-awareness. He seemed to think the planet would be fine, and I suspect he still feels the same. His view of environmentalists is contrary to what I believe, but it's always good to get the "other" point of view and, god forbid, have a sense of humor about it.

Global Warming jumps the shark

The phrase "Jump the Shark" has been in circulation for about 10 years now and originally denoted the moment/event when a television show passes its expiration date, so to speak, and begins its decline. The phrase derives from an episode of Happy Days where Fonzie - yes - jumps a shark on water skis, subsequently going down in the annals of absurd TV and spawning a phenomenon.

I can think of no more evident sign of a great global cause jumping the shark than a massive, intercontinental series of concerts designed to raise consciousness about that very cause. I'm talking about Live Earth here, Al Gore's just-completed pet project and, ostensibly, the first phase of his new campaign to bring an awareness of global warming to the masses.

Now, I think this blog is testament to where I stand on the issue and I'm no Al Gore hater, but it's been my experience that these mega concerts rarely, if ever, give the impetus for a cause to remain in the cultural consciousness for very long. In fact, I'd argue that they are consciousness killers. Not that they don't do any good or meet any of their immediate goals, but they bring important issues into the realm of commerce, where they are appropriated by the very interests that are part of the problem - big corporations and mass celebrity culture. Once the corporations get involved on the sponsorship side (as Chevy, for one, did), how much harder does it become for someone like Al Gore to call them out for inaction or, god forbid, malfeasance? Oh, he might still have the cajones to do it, but it's a slippery slope my friends.

Ironically, putting big name celebrities and musicians at the heart of this part of the campaign stands in contradiction to some of what Gore has to say in his latest book, The Assault on Reason. In it, he bemoans the disporportionate focus paid to events such as Anna Nicole Smith's death while "our nation was in the process of more quietly making what future historians will certainly describe as a series of catastrophically mistaken decisions on issues of war and peace, the global climate and human survival, freedom and barbarity, justice and fairness." Later, speaking of the degradation of television news, he states that "The subjugation of news by entertainment seriously harms our democracy: It leads to dysfunctional journalism that fails to inform the people. And when the people are not informed, they cannot hold goverment accountable when it is incompetent, corrupt or both."

Hell yeah. So, by Al's own testimony, celebrities and musicians, aka paid entertainers, may not be the best representatives for the cause at hand. It leads to, as Dan Rather put it about TV news, information being "dumbed down and tarted up."

To wit, some quotes from participants:

• "As a parent I want a decent world for my kids to grow up in and if we can draw attention to this and make people start doing the things that really count ... then that will do something."
  Simon Le Bon of Duran Duran



• "Our actions from this day forward will help determine just what sort of future we pass on to our children and to their children."
  Leonardo DiCaprio



• "America, what happened to us?"
  Melissa Etheridge



• "If you want to save the planet, I want you to start jumping up and down!"
  Madonna

Add into these empty pronouncements the vague concert banners admonishing people to "answer the call" and $40 organic cotton T-shirts proclaiming "Green Is the New Black," what does any of it actually say or ask people to do? We are continually awash in platitudes and banalities that lead to the intellectual atrophy of our society and that is too often what events of this nature offer.

I have no particular quibble with any of the participants but, as the saying goes, the road to hell is often paved with good intentions. And I do believe that most of these people involved have good intentions, although a lot of pixels have been spilled over Madonna's notable lack of green credentials.

As a country, it's been easy for us to sweep some of the big global issues addressed by concerts, such as poverty and AIDS, under the rug since they don't affect us very directly. We won't have that luxury in this case. Arguably, these concerts serve as a very rudimentary band-aid. Whether global warming has just "jumped the shark" in public consicousness or not, it's not something we'll be able to turn a blind eye to for much longer.

This is your society on drugs

I'm cranky this morning and the news has been no help in alleviating my bile. As if there wasn't enough reason already, a news article from AFP.com gives yet more justification to avoid anything labeled "Made in China."

The list of food ingredients potentially hitting our shores from China includes formaldehyde, hydrochloric acid, ciprofloxacin, enrofloxacin, industrial parrafin and the dye malachite green, as reported by China's food quality watchdog. These contaminants were found in baby milk powder, rice, flour, meat, biscuits, seafood, soy sauce and sweets, among many other products.

This is what I love about the bottom line, market-regulated model of society. Hey, I know, let's outsource public safety to a country with virtually no regulation, no public accountability and one of the more abysmal records on human rights. We've all lost complete sense of the idea of what something costs from cradle to grave and we've outsourced our consciences along with it. It's insanity. There would be something pathological about viewing this as a "natural" correction of a market-regulated economy, which some people will no doubt claim. A "few" animals had to pay the price this time; what will it be next time? Are we apathetic, ignorant, miguided or greedy enough to keep business as usual and just wait to find out? Unfortunately, I think there's little doubt we are.

In other news of the apocalypse, the Washington Post today published an article about Dick Cheney's covert operation to gut environmental regulations throughout the country. I'm not going to lie - I haven't read the entire article yet. Frankly, I'm afraid it will force me to ingest large amounts of food produced in China. I have skimmed it and it's depressing and predictable. For all his avuncular demeanor, Cheney is just another Tricky Dick for a new generation who, coincidentally, probably learned his tricks from Tricky Dick I.

I want to send a personal shot out to Ralph Nader who, as accurate as he may have been, in principle, regarding the corporate infiltration of both major political parties, helped elect the most ruthless, inept and morally corrupt administration this country has ever seen. You, sir, fucked us. Twice!

God, I'm pissed.